deviant art

Deviant Login
Buy Art Buy adCast Buy Premium Membership
Shop		  Join deviantART for FREE Take the Tour
×
Graduation DayGraduation Day:

They told us we would be alright...

We had fought with honour and won our titles.

We had overcome trials together -

Watching dozens of our siblings fall in the line of duty.

For this they had promised us, a wondrous welcome;

A bountiful world of adventure, with a myriad of paths.

All this, they said, awaited us in the stone cities.

Large metropolises, where the working folk resided...

There were hundreds of us, who made that journey.

Walking miles across the scorching desert,

Clinging to a hope of the fortunes beyond.

Yet what awaited us was not a promised land -

Nor was it a life based on the merit we had earned.
I wish...I wish I was a monster
So I could be kind
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I was colored
So I could respect people
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I was a man
So I could be kind to women
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I had male friends
So we could all be..
Just friends
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I had autism
So I could prove that autism,
Does NOT mean "dumb".
And I could break the stereotypes.

I wish I could change the world.
But sometimes, you can't break a stereotype.

Only stereotypes, can break you.
Lingerhow can i move forward,
when the fingerprints of my insecurities
are still lingering within my chest,
pressing against my ribs like piano keys?
i am just waiting, for the day,
when the saddest parts of me
are overcome with songs of serenity.
You don't just die.Do you understand?
The blade against your wrist
Doesn't just slice your skin.
It cuts through others
Hearts
Souls
And sanity.

Do you understand?
You don't just kill yourself.
You kill everyone.
Everyone dies
Everyone cries
Everyone suffers
From YOUR goodbyes.

Do you understand?
You don't just die.
You take everyone down
With you.
Pretty Blue PillsPretty blue pills,
shiny in my palm,
the ticket to my peace,
to my eternal calm.

They're so perfectly round,
and soon they'll be in me.
The closest to perfect
that I'll ever be.

They go down so smooth.
Five, ten, fifteen and twenty.
Soon I'll be gone.
Twenty-five and Thirty.

That should be enough,
but I'll play it safe.
Thirty-five and forty.
Now I have no more to take.

The bottle is empty,
as empty as I feel.
None of this is happening,
too good to be real.

But soon I start to drift
into a dark unknown fog.
Somewhere quite distantly.
I hear a muffled sob.

But I blow it off as fake.
Nobody could possibly care.
I doubt anyone's noticed
th
PhantomWhen life
or fate
or whatever it is
that puts things together
and takes them apart...
when It
amputated you,
it left me
with a phantom
limb
and you are still attached
to my body
when I dance
and make love
alone
ten ways this breakup isn't meant for the movies1.
you go out for twelve eggs and come back
with half a dozen and a new girlfriend.
you hold the eggs out to me like
six dead birds is enough of a peace offering.

2.
i push the eggs out of your hand and stay
with my hand over your heart as i watch them
fall. if they do not hit the ground, this is all a dream.

3.
the eggs smash on the tile and splatter
on the cherry wood cabinets, newly installed
that cost me two paychecks.

3.
the egg whites hit your leather shoes that
you’ve worn for two months straight
because you think they make you look more sophisticated.

3.
the egg whites hit the fridge halfway up, barely touching
the moose mag
Dear friend,You have to understand, dear
The reason to why I run.
I run away from reality
From the lungs that cannot
Take anymore smoke
From the heart that threatens to
Stop...
I run away because 
I'm a coward
Because I'm afraid of life
Afraid to care or love.
I'm afraid that every time
I'm glad it blows up in my face
And that every time I smile
I shed a million more tears.
That's why I run, dear 
You have to understand.
I was destined to be a fighter but
I don't want to fight anymore.
I was destined to be a warrior
But how am I supposed to win when
The war I fight is against life itself?
I know that I  always blow everything up but-
I keep stepping on mines, dear...
                          ...I keep stepping on mines...
ellipsisshe goes to sleep
clawing at her chest with pinpoint accuracy
for an emptiness she can’t describe,
but hates all the same. tomorrow

she will write a letter: “dear boy,
i always wanted to be somebody’s
flowery poem, but the verses carved in my arms
are riddled with ugly clichés. & you are why

i don’t sleep through the night. if
we were a language, i was the
subordinating conjunction, you were

the punctuation.

i remember you in staccato
conclusions, solemn absences
of goodbye”
brain squealsI beat depressions in the earth
for my brain squeals and waves
that burst in my wet ears
until something makes me drown.
I will. (again) V.

Virginia,

put rocks in pockets
and walk right in --
I'll drink your overcoat
until your throat weeps
and your soaked hair
weighs you down.

I promise.

with love,
Ouse.

P.S.
brain squeals are from cold sweats
sleep well.
TearsI am not afraid to cry.

I am not afraid for you to see the tears

My tears.

Don’t tell me I have no heart.

Don’t tell me I have no soul.

For without them I could not cry.

You may not see my tears but they are there.

I have learned to let myself cry for the things I’ve loved,

For the things I’ve lost.

They are silent tears, but they are mine.

So let me cry.

Let me show you I have a heart.

Let the things that touch my heart be shown through my tears.

I am not afraid to cry.
I am notI’m not your little boy.
You’re not my little girl.
I’m just someone you met,
And wants to change the world
I’m not the prince in your dreams
I don’t have smarts or might
I’m just the one that screams
And cries to sleep at night
I’m not who you want me to be.
I will never be what you are.
I’m myself, I am free.
I’m not ashamed of my scars
I’m not that weak
You’re not that strong
You still have company
But I’m still alone
So I speak
Though this poem.
It’s not a pretty love song
I’m just saying what pains me, explaining what’s going on.
Because I am not perfect,
I’m not retarded,
I’m just like you,
Broken Hearted
Never forget,
There is always a reason to be
And I won’t regret
I’m always happy to be me.
Second ShadowThe hand on your shoulder
The whispers in your mind
The words on your tongue
The voice in your throat
And the feelings in your soul

To drive to madness
To seduce the insane
To draw the blood
And dull the senses
To plague the memories
Of damage done
To fake safe haven
As the character changes

Light the anger and fuel the rage
Another mind to feed
A second shadow
To take you into eternity
Remnants
Hold on to my sanity every single day
I’m not gonna fall.
Those hungry, greedy holes you left
They start calling.

Just like a cold-blooded murderer
You use every heart you can find
When will you ever be satisfied?

You destroy everything you build
and tear everyone you love
Just to die and start over again.
Replay, replay, replay...
Until you grow weaker, and weaker.

You never destroyed me.
I destroyed myself to forget you.
I die every day in an endless cycle,
The rotating remnants of revolting hearts.

Just like water, I choke and swallow.
I mirror your mind, your thoughts, and your desire
And just like Narcissus, you fall deeper and
combatantI.
it strikes me
that this woman
could be a palace.

I marvel at
the opulent dome of
her brow, her arch
expression—

skin like a courtyard of
ivory tiles,
a thousand intersecting
golden lines about her
head and neck.

she beams from atop her
sunlit tower,
beatific and beautiful,

spreads her arms like
open doors,
invites you to be one of

the many
who have wandered her
lavish halls.

II.
I’ve often thought
of myself
as a castle:

all rough-hewn stone
and turrets,
a temper like molten
tar.

my head is crowned
with
embattled parapets,

weapons readied
at the crenels.

I look out from my
guerites, my brattices,
eyes like arrow-slits
Browse More Like This

More from ~SolarumNyx

from the heartbefore i begin
i solemnly swear
everything i write here
will be from my heart.

my birthday was yesterday
and the day before that was my father's
my family spent it planning a funeral.

my grandfather is dying
cancer
spreading through his lymphatic system
cells turning on themselves
consuming themselves
dying

tonight
a mere day after my nameday
my mother leaves us
for china
to watch as the life slips away
from a dear
father
grandfather
brother
son

sleep
it evades me
night after night
paralyzed
unmoving
rigid
as shadows dance across the walls

school is starting
soon
and the stress
threatens
to crush me

and thi
chromaWe were merely children when the stars came.

They rained down from the sky in a burst of light, like shards of glass pouring down from the heavens. Supernovas blooming in the night sky, petals raining down onto the barren earth - angels, falling with their wings sheathed, glowing, as they glided down. We watched, starstruck, as the glow overtook us - we were mesmerized. We waited with bated breath as the meteors landed, the celestial light subsiding as dark forms started to pick themselves up from the dust.

They moved towards us with an otherworldly grace, their steps leaving no marks on the earth as they descended upon us. Frozen to our sp

Featured in Groups

:iconwrite2livecancerfree:
×

to better days

:iconsolarumnyx:

the sky’s cold and grey and stormy and the wind bites at my lips --
today reminds me of you.

you tore at the seams of my heart, you know--
ripped out the stitches that held me together
and tied my heartstrings in knots

february comes and goes
and i can still hear your ringing laughter
the easy lines and slopes of your body
meshing into a polymerization of stardust

there were galaxies in your eyes
and moonlight in your hair
and somehow the night sky’s just not the same anymore

you’ve ruined me, you know
turned me into a storyteller with nothing to say
you’re a magpie,
stealing away the crystalline shards of my spirit
stealing me away from a place called “home”

march brings the spring,
riding on the tides of time
but there are only storm clouds clouding my eyes

lay cypress down over my door,
for i’ve died a million times before today

i’ve built my home in the pauses in your breath and
the hollows between your ribs
but
an apocryphal crypt is where you built yours.

75

6 5 1
:iconsolarumnyx:

to better daysby ~SolarumNyx

DescriptionDetailsShare
Download TXT download, 1.3 KB
a hilariously fun collab with the amazingly talented :icontherainontheirparade:
©2013 ~SolarumNyx
Category: Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

Details

Stats

Submitted on
February 25
File Size
1.3 KB
Views
75
Favourites
6 (who?)
Comments
5
Downloads
1
URL
Thumb
Only verified accounts can report policy violations. Please check your email and click on the verification link.
* Required field
Add a Comment:
 
Preview   Add Comment
:iconripvanwinkle316:
~RipVanWinkle316 Mar 21, 2013  Student Digital Artist
You're so COOOOOOLLLL!!
Reply
:icontherainontheirparade:
~therainontheirparade Feb 25, 2013
am i allowed to favorite this
like is that allowed
THIS WAS FUN AAAHHH ME GUSTA
Reply
:iconsolarumnyx:
~SolarumNyx Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'LL FAVE YOURS AND YOU FAVE MINE LOLOL
Reply
:icontherainontheirparade:
~therainontheirparade Feb 25, 2013
haHAHAHAHAHAHA
WE'RE SUPER COOL

COOLKATS
5EVA
xoxoxo
Reply
:iconsolarumnyx:
~SolarumNyx Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
5evaaaaaa
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
Preview   Add Comment
©2013 deviantART. All rights reserved
About Us | Contact Us | Developers | Careers | Site Tour | Help & FAQ Advertise | Premium Membership Etiquette | Privacy Policy | Terms of Service | Copyright Policy